Hello Blog Fans....
Happy Monday....It's been a whirl wind of changes, in the past few days. The biggest change for me, is the fact that I will not be having gastric bypass surgery! There are $3000.00 in program fees for this surgery and although we are doing better financially, $3000.00 is still a lot of money!! I tried for financing, but we've been through quite a few rough years and it just isn't possible. At first, I was very down and then, after a long talk with my dear brother, Pastor Dave, I feel a lot better about things.
This is going to be a whole new adventure, for me. I've been down the weight loss/diet road before and I've done well on some and failed at others. This time, I've chosen Richard Simmons Food Mover. Yeah sure, Richard Simmons is a bit of an odd duck....but my mother did really really well on his program once, so I'm thinking it might work for me. I won't be losing handfuls of weight at a time....It won't be dropping off, like mad...But if I'm faithful and honest, it will come off. All this aside, I also got the whole program, unopened and brand new, still in the box, for less that a dollar, at a yard sale that the Murphys Fire Department was having, on Memorial Day weekend.
I swear to goodness, it was providence!! Just when I think I know it all....Just when I think the path for me is lit and free of roadblocks, God comes and reminds me of a few things.
1. Lisa does not know it all......No matter what I think, say or do, I am not omnipresent and there is no way I'll ever know everything until I die and join my Jesus in Heaven.
2. I really feel I was using this surgery for Lisa's glory......and God got tired of reminding me "This is for MY glory, Lisa, not yours"
3. Since I started this quest for surgery and self, I was totally out of control, with my eating. I was out of control.....and I refuse to yield control to God, as well. I am so glad that I can come to my Heavenly Father with a repentant heart and not only be forgiven, but give that control back to God. When this is done, He rejoices with me and loves me all the more, because finally, I'm relying less on my own strength (useless) and leaning on His everlasting arms (glorious).....
4. I do not have to face intubation (this really scares me)....My skin won't sag as much, because my body will be able to adjust naturally, as I lose the weight....I won't lose my hair any faster than I'm losing it today.....I won't have to worry about any embarrassing gastric issues or vitamin deficiencies because my body is able to absorb what it needs from my healthy diet.
5. I will be able to give God glory and show others that with God, faith and support, all things are possible!!
I realize that I was a negative proponent for this type of surgery and I can't say that I wasn't wrong....I was! But this is something I feel, in my heart of hearts, that God wants me to do on my own....Without surgical intervention. The weight didn't get here, overnight and it's not supposed to just fall off, either. I hold absolutely no ill will for anyone who's had or will have weight loss surgery.....But in a lot of ways, I am relieved that God has chosen otherwise, for me. One of Richard Simmons' success stories, a man called Elijah lost 300 lbs and has kept it off for 25 years. Doing it naturally can be successful, if you want it bad enough!! And I do....I want it for me...to be healthy and more able to serve the way I want and need to....I want it to give glory to my King....I want to be an example to others and I want my family to be proud of me......
I know I've been through this, many many times! I guess I'll just have to show you all that this time, I'm serious and I'm going all the way.....Life's a climb, but the view's great!
Please pray for me as I walk through this little narrow gate at the top of the hill......The road below is full of ruts, it's steep and sometimes, it's dark and scary, but at the end, I see glory! I don't know how long it will take me, to get there, but my eyes are fixed on Jesus and I will run in the power of His spirit!
That said, things are going well for us, here in our little hamlet in the hills.....Mariah is out of school for summer....If summer ever arrives! I've wanted to live in the Pacific Northwest for years....Looks like I'm getting my wish and I don't even have to leave home!! Mark is doing well and we are happy and satisfied with our marriage. Life is good for us and I thank God everyday that He fills me with Himself, so that I can love without regard or reserve!
Have a wonderful day, my friends and remember to look for the rainbow above every cloud!!
God is walking me through....Let Him walk you, too!!
Be blessed!
Lisa
