I have been having some very good days, as of late.....I have been happy with the way things are going and the way I've been using my time. It makes me feel good, to accomplish all that I set out to do, in a single day and more, sometimes!! Money is still very tight, so I cannot go anywhere or do anything special....I find special things to do, here at home. Even if it's just taking the time to watch a television program that I like. I have been a little melancholy, too....I'm worried about not having money for Christmas and having to spend an entire week alone, with both of the kids here. Mariah by herself is a joy and I trust her, as much as I can,her being being a teenage girl....Donovan, though....I don't trust him at all....He's been sneaky and conniving in the past, as well as untruthful. So I asked Mark if he would take some time off of work, to be here, while the kids are here and it looks as if he might be able to....That's a big weight off of my shoulders.....Anyhow, the worry causes the melancholy....and I know that that's just satan, trying to build up a stronghold in my spirit. I can't let that happen, so I am learning to lean on Jesus and let Him shoulder the weight of my burdens, for me....I went and worked out, today! For the first time in a week or so! I haven't been very careful with my diet nor have I been sticking to my workout regime, lately and I think that is affecting the way I feel as well...I get really judgemental of myself, when I feel like I've failed...and let's face it, in my life, I've failed a lot, at a lot of things....There's really no reason for it!! I have better than average support....I have my sisters in Christ Gloria and Cindy, who are there for me, whenever I need....and I've got my good friend and counselor Pastor Dave (and his wife, Jill...of course) I've got my Bible and I've got good open prayer lines and I've also got a wonderful (well most of the time) and supportive and encouraging husband.....Mark does a great job with telling me how proud he is of me....and he tells other people too and that's a big thing for me. It encourages me and makes me feel very strong. A good deal of people don't understand how hard it is to start losing weight, when you are very large. Moving about is difficult....working out in a gym is embarassing and for most, not cost effective. And let's face it, healthy eating is expensive!! I've got it good though! My homeowners association just built a fitness room, at our community center, that's free for homeowners and tennants to use. So I have been going, since the end of September and have been very happy with my progress. When I first started going, I could walk for 15 minutes on the treadmill and then ride the recumbant bike for 5 minutes....Now, I walk on the treadmill for 40 minutes and bike for 20 to 30 minutes....I've gotten stronger, too...At the beginning, I was pressing 40 lbs with my legs, curling 30 lbs with my legs, pulling and curling 35 lbs with the high/low pulley on my arms, lifting 10 lbs on the shoulder machine and 15 lbs with the pectoral fly machine....Now I press 120 lbs with my legs, curl 90 lbs with my legs, high/low pulley is set at 80 lbs, 30 lbs with the shoulder machine and 45 with the pec fly..... and I like doing it, too.....
The snow from Monday is finally all melted away, at least it is here....I was in Angels Camp last night, for choir practice and there was still quite a bit of lingering snow, there....It was supposed to rain last night, but it didn't....It's been a bread baking day....I made a loaf of dark pumpernickle rye for Mark and I'm going to be baking a cardomom braid for Jill, tomorrow.....
We have a potluck party up at church on Sunday evening, this week and then our Candlelight Christmas Celebration and dessert buffet, next Sunday....As a choir, we are singing Jingle Bell Rock and Follow the Star.....and then I'm singing A Strange Way to Save the World, as a duet with Pastor Dave....I always look forward to our Candlelight Christmas Celebration....this is my third one....and I think I've lost enough weight to finally be able to wear my floor length black formal skirt.....I've wanted to wear that, for a really long time....
Anyhoo...I had better be jetting off...I've some things left to do, before Mark gets home.....Take care and love each other as He loves....
In Him,
Lisa
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